Page of Cups – Daily Draw
From my Daily Card Journal:
Who knows what surprises may arise from your heart?
Do you love yourself? Do you understand how important it is to do so?
Sometimes we are surprised by our own thoughts, actions or desires. What have you been keeping a secret from yourself lately?
Are you denying something inside – some deeply rooted need or idea – that you keep hidden because it doesn’t quite fit within your chosen ‘peer group’; because you fear being judged or laughed at? Are you worried about what others will think?
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Lately I have been trying to determine how much of my inner self is fit to share with others. I think we all go through this. We craft a personality to show the outside world, with varying degrees of honesty depending on how close someone is to you. From intimate friends and family, to close friends, to associates and the general world of potential friends and strangers. It’s not that we are faking anything, it’s that we may fear that what we hold deep inside might not be understood, and we may fear being judged or rejected by those who’s association we seek, and those with whom we must associate on a daily basis.
I believe that’s why these were the thoughts that surfaced today, when I first saw this card on my reading table. My immediate reaction was to give myself a hug and to feel loved and accepted. Then I thought about ways of releasing some of the ideas and feelings that I have been holding inside for some time. There are certainly constructive ways to reveal oneself to the rest of society without fear, and without alienating or angering others. You don’t need to blurt it out, you can just be yourself in the most positive manner available to you. But the important thing is to find ways to be true to yourself, both inside and on the outside. And to always find ways to continue to grow while staying true to who you truly are.
Harmony
This card’s primary meaning for me is harmony.
Cups deal with matters of the heart and emotions. This card quite often reflects a romantic relationship, although that is not the only meaning. As with all the other cards, context is important. It can also mean a harmonious partnership between friends or business associates. It can represent an arrangement between siblings or other family members in caring for parents, grandparents or children, who may not be cared for adequately by their own parents. I have found this to represent the bond between a human and a beloved pet on more than one occasion. The important thing to keep in mind is that it deals with emotional bonds and relationships. These can take many forms.
It can also represent a unity of opposites, as with the energies of Yin and Yang in Chinese philosophy. In this case it may represent opposing forces within a single psyche, as when an individual must find peace within themselves over an issue, and is striving for inner harmony. Between two or more people, it may mean a striving for balance among opposing personality types. But it is a favorable sign that folks are willing to work together to achieve this harmony among themselves. The opposite might be found in the Five of Wands which usually represents competition among associates, sometimes a healthy competition and sometimes contentious. In the Two of Cups, this would indicate a non-competitive effort to resolve differences and find common ground.
In most cases it is a positive card, reflecting love, friendship and cooperation.
Compassion
Since I quit my job, I’ve been fighting depression. I’ve been trying to figure out what to do for a living. I haven’t a car, or even a driver’s license and there is no public transportation from where I live. I’m sorta stuck in this small town, and attempting generate income from my websites, from reading Tarot online and freelance projects that I can do from home.
Things could be worse, although I would like them to be better. But I’m not homeless and I’m not starving. I think this depression is actually frustration. I do not feel as though I’m pulling my weight around here. Though logically I’m doing all I can. But I’m not always the most logical person in the world, especially when it comes to judging myself.
Today, for my daily card, I drew the King of Cups. I used the Gummy Bear Tarot
When I pull a daily card, I read it as primary energy or something I need to keep in mind for the day. So when I pull a court card, I rarely interpret it as a person. This is the case with today’s card.
I’m always amazed at how the Tarot ‘perceives’ my feelings, my needs and exactly what state of mind I’m in. This card, in this case, represents full and complete compassionate energy, understanding and emotional support. Considering my present circumstances, I’m doing all I can.
I need to stop being hard on myself, and to cultivate an understanding of my situation. I really am doing all I can do right now.
Three Steps to Happiness
I have simply not been feeling happy lately. I’m not talking about joy and elation every five minutes. It’s more a matter of contentment, and a feeling of satisfaction in day to day activities. It certainly doesn’t help that I’ve had a bad cold for about a week, but it goes deeper than that. The main problem is that my workplace has become spiritually toxic these days. It’s been a gradual deterioration, and it’s a shame, because at one time I really loved my job. But the atmosphere has been slowly changing due to the behavior of others. I have no control over that and I’m not yet ready to quit this job. So I need some counsel on what I can do to regain my happiness in spite of these circumstances.
Using the Hudes Tarot Deck
The second card is the Three of Wands. The standard image of this card as shown by the Rider Waite Tarot
Regarding this card, I wrote this affirmation in my journal,
Acknowledge and cultivate my personal power. Respect and honor my intellect, energy and talents. Honor myself by acknowledging that I am a good and capable person.
The final card is the Page of Cups. This counsel is to continue my studies in the spirit, including Tarot and other energy work. The advice is to focus on these things and to remain open as a child to them. To continue to learn and reflect as a student and allow my understanding to grow and deepen. This is my heart’s work and it will continue to feed and strengthen me as I continue on my life’s path.
It is interesting that the energies represented here are Fire (Wands) and Water (Cups). Fire is male/active and Cups are female/active. The strong energy of fire is flanked and supported by the strong energy of water. The male power within is focused through the female power that connects to the outer world. This is inner strength tempered and balanced by love and spirit; personal will focused channeled through God-Energy.
I will try to accept and apply this counsel through out the coming week. It will take a bit of effort and time, but if I can follow this path it will lead me back to a state contentment again.
A New Venture
My husband and I have been discussing an idea we have for a new business venture. One that we can work on together and will allow us to replace our present incomes. Using the Hudes
The first two cards show the inner and outer manifestations of the situation. I see the King of Pentacles representing the comfort level we had achieved with our employment situations crossed by the Five of Swords. This card is basically the “cheating” card. It’s a card of those who want to win at all costs, no matter how much they must lie and cheat to do so. On one level it reflects the strange circumstances under which my husband was laid off. But another level, and speaking more to me, shows my attitude and primary motivation behind my wanting this venture to succeed… an unhealthy desire to ‘get even’ with people who have wronged me at my workplace. This is not the best foundation for a new venture and it’s something I need to change in my heart.
The outcome card, the Wheel of Fortune, is noncommittal. The outcome of our new venture is purely up to chance. Perhaps if I change my primary motivation for wanting to start this venture, the outcome card would also change. My primary motivation should be to benefit our family and to find satisfaction in my tasks – not to get back at people.
The past is very clearly stated here – The Devil – security through enslavement. It’s ‘easier’ to stay in a job that makes you unhappy because of the illusion of security. The fact that you know a paycheck is coming from someone you are working for vs. earning money by working for yourself in a self-employed situation. This is in the past and it is time to move on.
The Nadir card, or spiritual past, is the Nine of Cups. This is often called the ‘wish fulfillment’ card and it’s nice to see it in this spread. However, in this position I think it reflects the a deep heart’s desire and basic motivation to become self-employed and to be successful.
The Zenith card, or spiritual future, is the Page of Pentacles. This reflects the learning experience involved in starting a new venture, along with the idea of starting over again financially. I interpret it this way as a result of a comparson with the King of Pentacles, which represents the level of comfort we have achieved through employment. The Page is representing new financial growth, with the goal of eventually maturing to the King that lies in the heart of the reading.
I think a change of attitude and motivation on my part will result in success. I will need to meditate on this further to bring about this change in my heart.
Conflict of Queens
Yesterday, I had an interesting experience. I did my usual three-card spread in the morning to understand the major influences for the day. I drew the Five of Swords, the Queen of Cups and the Queen of Wands. But the only thing significant that happened to me yesterday was a major panic attack I had while worrying needlessly about someone I love.
I can have an overactive imagination, and sometimes worries will take absolute control of my thought processes. The worries become stronger than anything, and I cannot seem to prevent them from overriding any rationality or reasoning that I normally use to calm myself. It is like being in a car with no brakes and no steering and going down a steep hill very fast. You can only pray that you don’t crash and burn. I don’t know why I get like this, but I do.
I tend to read the Five of Swords as “cheating” or “gloating after winning”, but sometimes I find it signifies a mental imbalance of some kind. When I pulled the card in the morning with the two Queens I immediately thought that I would have some sort of confrontation with someone who would be the Queen of Wands, and one of us would have a bad attitude about the outcome of the confrontation. When I pull the Queen of Cups I usually think that it is me, as this card tends to signify myself in readings. But I could not determine who the Queen of Wands would be. All the ladies I work with would likely be Queens of Swords, Cups or Pentacles. There is only one co-worker who could be the Queen of Wands I had no confrontations with her that day.
So, in retrospect I think this spread was warning me of my impending panic attack. But I can’t quite figure out how.
It could be that the two Queens were opposing aspects of myself (Cups=Water, Wands=Fire) with the resulting turmoil in my psyche (the Five of Swords) causing the disturbance. I can also note that at certain times of the month I tend more toward panic attacks than at other times. The presence of the two Queens in the spread could certainly point to such a state in my body and mind, with the Five of Swords representing the mental imbalance that can result from that state.
Whatever the meaning and however it might fit the events of the day, I will continue to ponder it. The cards speak clearly, it is just sometimes hard for us to understand what it is they are trying to tell us. This is why a daily spread is such a good learning tool for those who would understand the Tarot. Comparing spreads with the daily events can help us understand how these various elements interrelate, and work together to form a meaning and a message.
